Excitement

It's weird, but after all of Motes's teachings, I'm EXCITED for the AP comp test. I'm scared, yes; I still suck at writing, yes; I could very well fail, yes. I'm excited.

The first test tomorrow. The second to last test AP test of the year. First three hours before my freedom. Last three hours before a test I never learned.

Part of me wants to show off on this test, to prove to myself that I've grown. Rhetorical Analysis, Open Essay, Synthesis, all achievable. Taught to me, no, absorbed by me in that classroom where Motes exudes his knowledge everyday. Osmosis man, osmosis.

I'm a coward. Rhetorical Analysis is frightening. I just can't find enough. Motes always taught evidence. Check. Recheck. I can't do that. Observations, yes. Inferences, evidence, checks, and rechecks? No. I'm a failure.

But then I read something like Salinger, Maugham, Nabokov. I see those tools at work. I predict something about the tone. It happens. Nah, cowardice is the last thing I need.

Tonight, I'll just visit some friends. Barrons and PR. They make good companions. Just hope I don't fall asleep before 10:00.